Still Off Sick

I went back to the doctor today and have been signed off for another two weeks. My parents are going to be cross. They kept telling me I had to refuse a sick note. Not sure how to break it to them. I know they mean well but they don’t understand. Oh well, I guess it doesn’t matter that they don’t like it, I’m still off. I will do some praying before I speak to them I think. I’ve had my medication changed and increased as well, yipee Means I’ll be feeling rough for a few days but I’ll manage. I’m so grateful to Chris though for coming with me earlier, had to wait over half an hour, would have really panicked without company.

Watched an amazing preach today, Mark Driscoll’s Marriage and Women. The Marriage and Men one is really good too. I really think people should watch them both. They are really useful and practical. Controversial yes, but Biblically correct and well worth paying attention too. I would love to visit Mars Hill one day. Church was amazing yesterday too. Phil preached, there were 16 baptisms, and 20 people became Christians. God is so incredible

I’ve been really blessed in that I’ve been spending a lot of time with Naomi. She is fast becoming one of my closest friend. I’m spending so much time with her, she is really fun and easy to be around, and a good friend. We’re going to another friend’s house for dinner tonight which will be great, and tomorrow we’re off out with a different friend and on Wednesday and Thursday we’re going to the cinema and bowling respectfully. It will be great.

Had a lovely date with Chris yesterday I love him so much and love spending time with him. We went to a restaurant just along the coast, on the cliffs and it was lovely. The sun was shining and the sea looked beautiful.

Must get back to essay writing. My two term papers are due in on 20th April (day I go back to work). I’ve started writing one of them, am 800 words in. Only 4200 to go! Eek! Nah it will be OK, I just need to keep my concentration up.

25th July 2008

Well I went to the doctor this morning and am off sick for another fortnight and have been referred to a psychiatrist. Michelle – is that what you mean by “proper treatment”? I don’t know what else they can do really.

Had my church counselling yesterday. In hindsight, since I started the counselling my panic attacks have started to get better, although am still having them. We prayed against any bonds I still had with my ex and repented of all the promises I had made and things I had done and felt so good after. I felt at peace and cleansed, and released. It was a good feeling

Yesterday evening was lovely too. We took a stroll along Shoreham Beach, it was warm and peaceful, just gorgeous:

I’ve had two panic attacks today, not sure why I had either. Things will get better though, I have to believe that. One attack was at the doctors, probably because they scare me. The other was at Suzy’s. No idea why that set me off….maybe because she is anxious too and it was a bit awkward having a deep and meaningful chat as Chris was there….I dunno. I’m still refusing to give up though. God is slowly changing me. And maybe Chris is right, maybe God is making me stronger through this time so later in life I can cope and be a help to others? Only time will tell I guess.